A Blog for Your Month

What a Difference a Word Makes ~ A Reaching Happiness Blog

Lately I’ve been changing the thought “I have to” into the thought “I get to.” You’d be surprised what a difference that makes. I have to do the laundry becomes I get to do the laundry. I get to smell the clothes and touch my face to their warmth when they come out of the dryer. I get to have clean clothes to wear. I get to do something productive that really doesn’t take that much time. I get to use a washer and dryer conveniently located inside my home instead of cleaning my clothes in any manner of ways that other people do. Washing them in a stream for instance.

What can you come up with when you change “I have to” to “I get to?” One of my definite “get to’s” used to be driving my son to school in the mornings. We had a routine. Pop his oatmeal in the microwave, toast his bagel, stir his instant breakfast, and most importantly, brew my coffee. Juggle all that with his books and whatnot out to the car and strap ourselves in for breakfast (him), coffee (me) and radio (KFog). What a great station. Not only did they play good tunes, but they had great conversations, which sometimes led us into great conversations. And the mountains! As we headed in the direction of the hills surrounding San Jose, the sun would be just cresting off the mountains. I loved that sight. The whole experience was lovely, which was not to say that I never wished I was sleeping in or that he went to a school closer to us. But most of the time, I definitely felt like “I get to. I get to drive my son to school and it’s alright.”

What about now? I get to pick up the dog’s poop? That’s a tough one. I was complaining inside my head about it today in fact. Let’s consider. He is still alive, two years after we were told he wouldn’t be. That’s a definite get to. He does tend to go in one area, which is really quite considerate of him. How long does it take me to pick it all up? Five minutes? That’s not too bad. Not as good as the sun on the mountains, but maybe I could take in the garden for a moment while I’m out there.

What else? I get to write these to you, and many of you tell me you like what I say. I get to help. That’s such a plus in my life. I get to make a difference. I am so grateful for that.
And I get to laugh. Almost every day I laugh with someone about something. So work is great. I get to work.

And I get to break up my work day with a walk. I love my walk! There was a time when that was a definite “have to,” mainly because of the dog. Now it feeds my soul. Even after the dog was too old to do it, I’ve kept going. It keeps me in shape, and it’s become a form of meditation. When I occasionally have to miss it I can’t wait to get back to it.

I urge you to try this simple change of words. It’s amazing how just spending a few minutes playing with this can change your outlook and your mood. And that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? Enjoying this life as we are living it. Not waiting for it to get better, but creating it better, right here and now. I get to, I get to, I get to. And just see how much better it gets.

with love and light ~ Janet   www.reachinghappiness.com

More Than Just a Body ~ A Way More Woo Woo Blog*

I keep telling myself that I am not a body. But I’m having a hard time believing it. According to A Course in Miracles most of our problems come from identifying too closely with our physical selves and not identifying enough with our spirit selves. I like to think of our spirits as ambassadors from another plane. (Plane and planet are pretty close as words...interesting.) Anyway, I think of our spirits as here to spread love. I picture us, in this other dimension where we’re not bodies, saying “me, me! I’ll go! I just know I can remember that I’m made of love this time!” Then we get here and we get schooled in the reality of being a body. By the time we’re two we can tell everyone what our name is, who our mommy is, how big we are, and where to find our nose and our toes. We are taught the curriculum of the physical world.

I once went to a psychology lecture where the instructor said “without an ego you can’t get on the bus.” Our physical, bodily selves are necessary for moving around in this world, so I don’t want to discount them. But somewhere along the line in life we lose the knowledge that we are more than physical. We lose the knowledge that We are the thing that animates the physical, the Life within. I think our physical lives would flow better if we identified more with the non-physical.

You could call it Presence. I’m in a Covenant Group studying Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth. This will be the third time I’ve read it. I keep rereading it because I keep forgetting about Presence, the same way I keep forgetting that I am not a body. If I really focus on being still for a moment and feel the breath coming in and out of my nose, I can fleetingly sense the Presence within and beyond my body.

This is good news when it’s not going so well with the body. My husband was up quite a bit last night, in pain, and my sleep was affected by my awareness that he was in pain. We have discovered that our sleep is often marked by tension. I hold mine especially in my jaw. I know I’m not alone in this. As we age, the stresses of life seem to accumulate and our bodies hold it all. When I wake up in the morning and feel the effects of tense muscles it helps to know that I am more than just a body. When my husband is in pain, it helps to know that he is not just a body. It helps me, anyway. I'm not sure he would agree. But if I can remember that I am not a body and I can click into being that ambassador of love, I believe it helps him, too.

(*this blog is especially for the clients and friends who like to explore the bounds of reality with me)

Creating Liquid Gold

In my Law of Attraction group, we were given the assignment of writing how much money we intend to make each year, breaking it down into weekly bites and then spending 3 minutes a day relishing the prospect of our plan coming to life. We were also told some important caveats - don't compare our amounts with others, don't even share our amounts with others unless they support us in our vision, treat it very lightly ( like a game), but take it seriously enough to visit it weekly and fine tune our actions to support its viability. Most importantly for me, we were told to manage our thoughts so that we didn't get discouraged and to let go of the time table...that we aren't in control of when the Universe delivers this to us, but we can absolutely count on it happening.

If you've been reading my blogs, you know that I've known this for a long time but have yet to see it happen. After my last blog, entitled Money Prayers, I realized that even though I've listened for years to Abraham-Hicks CD's, telling me not to focus on the lack of what I want, that is exactly what I was doing. My mind may have been concentrating on my vision, but my emotions were very compellingly camping out in "not enough." So I decided to get off the topic of money altogether and began to focus on everything that feels truly good right now. It's been working pretty well, too. My outlook is brighter, and I can feel the possibilities opening up. Things are shifting for the better.

So how do I bring my attention back around to money, 3 minutes a day, and still feel good? It's a pretty emotionally loaded topic for me still. I think the answer has something to do with how I conceptualize my ego and my Self. With the help of another old favorite, Emmanuel's Book III, What is an Angel Doing Here? by Pat Rodegast, I have been playing with the notion of dancing light. Emmanuel is another channeled being (group of beings?) that inspired Ram Dass, and their writing is lovely. In the book someone asked a question about having seen bodies, trees and stones as dancing light and they say "(You) experienced a journey out of the familiar into the real. And what really is is dancing light."

So, money is dancing light. I am dancing light. Anything that appears solid is like a hologram; it's not really solid at all. It is made of dancing light. I am connected to all of it. In fact, I'm not an "I" in a solid, separated sense. This sense of myself as solid and separated has been termed "ego," which I've been conceptualizing as the part of my mind that thinks alone. The minute I remember that my mind is connected to broader mind I regain my bearings.

Bringing money to me alone has never worked for me. Winning money on behalf of my ego doesn't last, and I honestly don't think it lasts for companies or countries, either. Being for the self alone, it is tenuous and guarded carefully; it can be lost to another separated self at any moment. In contrast, when I recognize that all of life, money and humans included, is dancing light, I realize that we are never really apart. We cannot be separated from one another and together we cannot be separated from money. With that in mind, I can imagine for 3 minutes a day that the light is already with me/in me and I am simply giving it a suggestion of what form I would like it to take. My ego or sense of myself as separate might get attached to this form, as if the manifestation proves something about my worth. But my whole Self, my dancing light self, knows that I am already part of everything anyway. As a light being, I'm fine; I'm complete; I have everything I need. The only reason to have a vision or a point of focus is to give the dancing light of life a channel to move through, a form to take. And as we live and experience life, our minds continuously come up with new forms. That's the creative part...realizing what form we want to suggest now and putting it into motion.

So I'm not going to get attached to my vision as if it is solid and fixed and real. I'm going to start my 3 minutes reminding myself of the dancing light. Then I'm going to visit my vision and play with it and delight in it and allow it to unfold and change it as I go...and try my hardest not to freeze the dancing light in any form, but to see it as liquid gold, flowing through my life on its way to more.

money prayers

I feel like writing something to you all, and I'm not sure what. That must mean that I'm writing something to me, and you are listening in. Money has been tough lately. Interestingly enough, as its been tough for me, it seems to be tough for my clients as well. That's our vibration at work. We're melding. Which is a bummer, because none of us want to attract less money. So I got really excited yesterday when I managed to feel truly happy even though I had a record low in terms of income. I felt like I had a glimpse of what people in poor countries do to stay happy, regardless of their poverty conditions. My inspiration was the line "I would rather control my thoughts than control the conditions" from Gerald Jampolsky's book Love is Letting Go of Fear. It's an oldy, written in the 70's, but sometimes I go through old standbys to hear the same message in a fresh way. I worked with my thoughts and worked with my thoughts and I wouldn't give up until I had completely turned them around. I really believe that turning my thoughts and feelings around will turn my circumstances around. And I was so excited! I told my husband "I'm doing it! I've shifted my vibration! I'm happy! Now the money has to come!"

But tonight I can feel myself turning back again. My car is reversing its course, recovering old ground. The pull of the old territory, the one it knows, is strong. The old thoughts keep slipping back in. I think this is true of any habit we're trying to change. So tonight I'm in my tough zone, in withdrawl from my familiar thoughts and trying to hang in there with the new ones. I guess that's why I thought I'd reach out to you. And write about it. When we teach, we reinforce what we know. I'm trying to reinforce this new knowing. I met with a new coach on Monday, and I told her...I know what to do. I know what actions to take. There are a gazillion actions I could take. What I need help with is my vibration. Because I can feel when my actions are hollow, or worse yet, when I'm defeated as I go through the motions. Sure, I can check it off my list, and there's some small satisfaction in that. But I don't really expect it to get me anywhere. Abraham says on those days, put it down and go to the beach. That's great advice and very hard to do if I'm worried about money. There are bills to pay after all.

So I'm doing anything I can to help myself feel better. I'm coaching you and I'm coaching myself, here on-line. Just doing what I love to do. Feeling, being honest, connecting with you. Knowing that we are all connected in Spirit. Sending out my vibrational advertisement. And here is my prayer.

God, I want to feel your presence with me now. I want to feel your presence as me as I love. I want to feel your presence as me as I teach. I want to feel your presence as me and as money, belongings, beauty and opportunity. I want to feel your presence as me as I coach. Please infuse all the aspects of my coaching with you, God, with your grace and your joy and your love. Thank you so much. So it is and so I let it be. I am so very grateful to you, God, for being here. I know that all will be well. Amen.

looking on the bright side...or not

You know that saying, "don't cry over spilled milk?" Well, I just literally spilled my milk as I was getting out of the car. I ran into the house to get a rag to clean the spill before my car began to smell, and as I was putting soap and water on the rag I thought "At least I spilled it at home, where I had access to soap, water and a rag." Then I thought "Now that's looking on the bright side."

Looking on the bright side is what Law of Attraction is all about. When we look on the bright side, we attract the bright, the shining, the stellar, the exemplary. And that's what we all want, right? We want to attract the good into our life. But what about the times when we can't look on the bright side - we can't find it, no matter how hard we look. And it seems that the harder we look, the more elusive it is.

According to the Law of Attraction...hold on, I'm just going to start quoting Abraham here. Abraham is a non-physical, inner being that speaks through Esther Hicks. (nothing to do with the Abraham of the Bible) Esther calls it her inner inspiration and says that we all have that inner inspiration within us. I agree. If you've read my website, (www.reachinghappiness.com) you'll see the links to Abraham on my resources page. I'm getting bolder and bolder about just talking about Abraham, right out there in the open. The whole voice speaking through Esther thing is a little weird, a little woo woo...my husband and my brother-in-law both think I'm getting hoodwinked by a charlatan...which is hard, I admit. And I care about what you, my readers, think as well. I don't want to lose my credibility with you. But at the same time, this message resonates so deeply with me it's just sort of spilling out of me. And I suspect that its time has come -that a message coming from a spiritual, non-physical source that we all have within is not so hard to swallow for many of you. We've been calling that intuition or a sixth sense for years, haven't we? And some of us have expanded our image of God to include this feeling of inspiration. So call it what you will; it speaks to me, and I want to share the message with you and give credit where credit is due.

So according to Abraham, when we are feeling bleak, as I was last week, all the thoughts that we attract are bleak thoughts. Have you ever noticed that? I got a new ring for my 50th birthday/20th anniversary. It's been so interesting to watch my reaction to it. When I'm feeling good, I love it. I think it's beautiful, dazzling, glorious. When I'm feeling down I think it maybe doesn't look right on my finger, or I wonder if that's a scratch I see on it or it would look better if my nails were longer. That may seem like a silly example, but we could apply that to anything. If you're trying to change something in your life, how do you feel about your prospects if you're up and how do those same prospects look if you're down? Even exercising...I have more energy, and I can get my heart rate up higher when I am mentally up.

So one would assume that the answer is to always stay up, and believe me, I was trying that. I  was "reaching for a thought that feels better"(another Abrahamism). I was doing great, and then I hit a snag and came crashing down. As I picked myself up after falling, I realized that I may have been up on the surface, but there was an undercurrent of feeling down that I wasn't paying attention to. Underneath, discouragement was building. Fear of failure is a potent undercurrent for me, and I'm writing about it because I suspect that it is for you, too. The Law of Attraction responds to our deeper, stronger vibration...which is why what we want can be slow in coming, despite our efforts and our positive thinking.

So, what to do...first of all, we have to be as honest as we can be about where we really are. I decided I'm going to go back to journaling my real thoughts no matter what they are, instead of automatically reaching for a better feeling thought. The more positive thoughts can come later, after I've emptied out what's there. You may have a different way of being honest - talking to a friend, mulling it over in your head as you jog, blogging. I suspect that once I've been honest with myself, the better feeling thoughts will come floating in, from my inner inspiration. Here's an important point to keep in mind. Thinking our negative thoughts with the mind set that they're real, they're justified and true, is not helpful. But thinking our negative thoughts with a mindset of clearing them out is extremely helpful.

If you'll indulge me, I'll go one step farther, and speak from something else that I love, The Course in Miracles. The Course in Miracles is a metaphysical take on the Christian message. It tells us to join our mind with the Christ mind. The Christ mind is the enlightened mind. (Sounds Buddhist, doesn't it? I love it when all these teachings intersect!) It says to pay attention to your thoughts (Law of Attraction) and when you can tell that you're feeling separated, ask Christ to give you another thought, one of His thoughts. ( I'm throwing this in for those who are Christian in their orientation. If you are, you probably recognize messages like this. If you're not, it won't have meaning for you, so pull from your own experience ) By separated I mean off center, not in the flow, uninspired...separated...a far cry from what is right and good and true about you, not connected to your spirit. Afraid. The Course in Miracles says there are two emotions - love and fear. All other emotions come from them. Abraham says there are two emotions - the good feeling ones and the bad feelings ones. Separated or connected.

And here's the one main thought that I hold on to when I feel separated. All the major sources of inspiration tell us this - the Bible, Abraham, The Course are the ones that I'm familiar with. The separation is an illusion. It is only in our mind, and it can be corrected with our mind. It's not real, nor can it ever be real. We can never really leave the Source of our being, the life that flows through us. Did you know that they can hear the heatbeat of a fetus before the heart is formed? What is that, beating the heart? Whatever it is, it is always with us, even when we're down. Even when, in our thoughts, in our mind's eye, we have separated from it. We never really can. We don't have that kind of power. God, or whatever created us and created the mountains and the trees and the oceans, whatever you call that, will always have more power than any thought that anyone may be thinking at any moment in time. When I hold on to that thought, I start feeling better. No matter how down I am. Now that's powerful.

      Janet